The Inside Scoop

March 6, 2016

I came across an interesting interview on the Monica + Andy website and it inspired me to ask the same questions that were posed to another mother to myself. If you are a fellow mother/blogger I encourage you to do the same and please let me know when you have posted your answers, so that I may read and share them!

On Motherhood

Maternity Photoshoot

The moment this mom thing felt real:

The first time they put Joaquín on my chest after my c-section and he looked at me with his big, beautiful brown eyes. It was instantaneous love at first sight! From that moment on, it felt like my heart existed outside of my body, because Joaquín is my heart.

Most proud of: 

The Doctors warned me that since Joaquín came a month early, he would most likely be delayed in his developments. Not only has he not been delayed, but he reaches his milestones months before he is supposed to, like walking running at 9 months.

Keeps you up at night:

Thinking about how am I going to get everything I need to get done the next day? I have let go of the pursuit of balance and in most cases I just triage my days. The most important stuff gets done and the things that can wait get pushed for another day. I read a quote a while ago that deeply resonated with me, “I am beginning to understand that I cannot have it all, but I have enough. And my enough is so much.” That quote completely changed my outlook on life and motherhood and definitely helps me sleep better at night even knowing that I will not accomplish everything I need to the next day, but it is okay.

Most surprising thing about motherhood:

How much I want to be with my son 24/7. Five minutes after I have put him to sleep — no matter how exhausted I am from the day — I want to go back into his room and crawl in his crib with him I miss him that much! My husband and I will adoringly watch him on the monitor or look at videos and photos that we have recently took of him. I am also surprised at how easy it is for me to put family before work.

Scariest thing about motherhood:

Not being in 100% control. All I can do is be the best mom to Joaquín and hope with all of my heart that 1) nothing bad ever happens to him and 2) he turns out to be an amazing man one day.

Family motto:

Love (and kisses) is all you need!

Biggest mom mistake:

Not taking any baby classes before Joaquín arrived. I knew zero about babies when he was born and had to learn everything on the job, which was incredibly overwhelming when I was recovering from a c-section and utterly sleep deprived. The first time I had to change his diaper alone I was shaking and sweating (now I could do it with my eyes closed and with one arm tied behind my back).

Best #momtip: 

Stop judging other moms! We are all different in our own unique and special ways and at the end of the day we are doing what is best for our babies and ourselves. We need to lift each other up and support each other. I think moms are the most amazing people in the world.

Work It

Newborn Photoshoot

Gets out of the house in the AM thanks to:

My extraordinary mom or our nanny who comes twice a week.

Best career move:

Working for myself. I am a natural born leader and I would not have been as successful as I am today if I had been working for someone else, even though everyone around me told me I should start off small and not dare to dream too big. I am so glad that I listened to my gut! Also, because I work for myself, I am able to schedule my work around Joaquín and thus avoided having to put him into daycare.

What you thought you would be doing at 35:

Exactly what I am doing now: I am a wife, mother, business owner, and home owner.

Most thankful for:

My husband, our new house, and that I overcame postpartum anxiety and depression. I plan to write a post soon about how I accomplished the latter.

After work/pre-bedtime ritual:

The nights my husband works, I catch up on all of my girly TV shows and go to bed as early as possible. The nights my husband does not work, we cuddle while watching HGTV and dream about everything we want to do to our house. Usually there is some popcorn involved.

One thing from last week you would do differently:

I could tell something was wrong with Joaquín, but I thought maybe I was overreacting, since he has never been sick before. By the time I finally took him in to see the Doctor, he had a double ear infection and pink eye and needed 10 days of antibiotics. The Doctor said the outcome would have been the same no matter when I brought him in, however I cannot stop thinking about how I should have just listened to my intuition. I will going forward!

Her Vitals

Smash Cake Photoshoot

Next to your bed:

Alarm clock, baby monitor, bouquet of flowers from my husband, iPhone, bottle of water, and laptop.

In your handbag:

Day planner, pen, keys, iPhone, makeup bag, glasses, sunglasses, wallet, snacks, bottle of water, pashmina, and a brush. Everything else is in the diaper bag.

On your DVR:

Jane the Virgin, Grey’s Anatomy, Scandal, Telenovela, and House of Cards.

Decompresses by:

Taking Joaquín to the park or going out to dinner with my husband.

Hardcover or Kindle:

Neither, I do not have time to read books.

Last iTunes purchase:

The Road Chip. What can I say? Joaquín is obsessed with the Chipmunks!

Dream handbag:

I already have a really nice collection thanks in large part due to my husband, but I am loving the Valentino rockstud collection, as well the Chloe crossbody saddle bag collection.

Currently obsessed with:

Decorating our home! I do not know what I am going to do when I run out of rooms to decorate?

Cannot get into:

A workout routine. I so desperately need to lose all of the baby weight I gained, but I simply cannot find the time.

Could not do it without:

My Mom. Have I mentioned how she is the best? Also, coffee!

14 thoughts on “The Inside Scoop

  1. Vanessa

    This is so cool to read!! You are such an inspiration!! One of my biggest lessons as a therapist seems to be the same as your biggest lesson as a mom: being good-enough is enough!! Perfection (and 100% control) is not only impossible, but undesirable.
    Your post also brought up something kind of painful for me that I’ll share privately. I will just say here that you are a big reason that I now have the hope to become a mom myself in the next few years. I’ll be shaking and sweating like you were, and I’ll be sure to take some baby classes before I become a mom!!
    Lots and lots of love,
    Vanessa

    Reply
    1. Andi Perullo de Ledesma Post author

      I’m so glad you enjoyed this post! Thank you so much for your kind words. Mean the world to me!!! I’m so thrilled and excited that you’re thinking about becoming a mom — you’re going to be an AMAZING one. Definitely take classes before. I would even recommend taking them before you’re pregnant, because you never know how your pregnancy will be. I was nauseous and exhausted the entire time, so that’s why I never took classes, plus the pre-eclampsia and bedrest. Love you sweetie!!!

      Reply
  2. Natalie

    I loved reading this! The description of triaging the day is SO true. I work from home while keeping up with my toddler, and it really is only the most important stuff that actually gets done. And YES to the fact that I’m obsessed with spending time with my kid–we do the doting over the monitor thing, too! 😀 😀

    Reply
    1. Andi Perullo de Ledesma Post author

      Isn’t that the perfect word for motherhood? Triage? Haha! I thought about that the other night when unfortunately I had to go to Urgent Care, because I was sick. I think it must be the funniest picture in the world to see exhausted parents staring at the monitor like it’s the most beautiful thing in the world. 🙂

      Reply
  3. Melissa Cole

    I LOVE this & might totally share as well! & thanks for being real! I also struggled with postpartum depression with my first. It’s the most isolating thing if you don’t seek help or talk about it.

    Reply
    1. Andi Perullo de Ledesma Post author

      Thank you if you shared it and you’re welcome for being real! I’m all about authenticity now that I’m a mom. I’m so sorry that you went through PPD, but it sounds like you got over it and had a 2nd baby, which is AWESOME!!! PPD is so isolating. I don’t wish it on my worst enemy!

      Reply
  4. Laura @Travelocafe

    I am so happy that in the end everything worked out just the way you wanted. There have been many obstacles in your way but you are a survivor and an achiever… an inspiration for us all.

    Reply

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