How To Choose The Right Relationship Counselor

March 27, 2017

Many people feel like working with a professional relationship counselor saved them, whether it was their marriage or their relationship with another loved one. When you go to a relationship counselor, it gives you the opportunity to take part in therapy together, work through problems, and find better solutions to the relationship issue you might have.

Despite the benefits, there can be a tendency of people to feel overwhelmed by the concept of going to a counselor, particularly with another person. One of the significant roadblocks a lot of people experience is that they do not know where to begin, particularly when it comes to choosing the right counselor for their needs.

The following are a few things you can keep in mind when you’re choosing a therapist:

Look For Specialty Areas

A lot of people do not realize just how specialized counselors, psychologists, and therapists often are, even if they work in the general field of relationships. If you are having a particular relationship problem, you should look for someone who specializes in that. Some of the many areas of specialization you might find include counselors who approach their work from within the framework of a particular religion, LGBT counselors, and many more niche areas.

It is also important to note that not every therapist is well-equipped to take on clients who want relationship counseling. There are completely different dynamics and approaches to working with more than one person in a relationship, and it is important the person you choose has the skills and experience the address these challenges.


You want a counselor or therapist with values that reflect your own. For example, some counselors or therapists might seem more inclined to guide clients toward ending a relationship than repairing it or they might think there is only one right way to do things. It is important to initially discuss values and approach with potential counselors before you start officially working with them.

Read Reviews

The best way to often find the right relationship counselor is to get recommendations from people you trust, but that might not always be possible, so you might have to stick with reading reviews instead. Online reviews can give you some sense of the experience other people have had with a therapist and they are a good starting place when you’re making a decision.


Even if you have found a therapist that seems perfect on paper with glowing reviews and specialties that match what you are looking for, you still need to be comfortable with them. If you are not comfortable and at-ease, the sessions will never bring you any benefits. This is someone you are going to be telling your deepest relationship and intimacy concerns and secrets to.

The best way to gauge whether or not you are comfortable is to have an introductory session. Spend some time talking, almost as if you’re interviewing the therapist. If you find that it is difficult to open up or you do not feel at ease, you may have to find someone else.

Choosing a good relationship counselor can be one of the most important things you do in your life, so it is important to take your time and find someone not just who has all the experience and professional credentials, but who you feel can bring value to your situation.


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Andi Perullo de Ledesma

I am Andi Perullo de Ledesma, a Chinese Medicine Doctor and Travel Photojournalist in Charlotte, NC. I am also wife to Lucas and mother to Joaquín. Follow us as we explore life and the world one beautiful adventure at a time.

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