How To Improve A Couple’s Connection

January 9, 2018

Every now and then, we can feel a little disconnected from the world. Whether it be our jobs, family, friends, or even a relationship, this disconnection can seem worrisome and even abnormal. It is, however, normal, and no matter how alien this sensation may feel to you, remember than not one person walks through life, forever feeling connected to everything and everyone.

When we feel disconnected to our partner though, it can quite easily spell trouble. In this day and age, it is dating until you find the one, and because dating is becoming more fast-paced, we are more prone to giving up on budding relationships before they have even flourished. Although this can become easy when you have only known someone for a few weeks, when it is a long-term partner, your spouse, or your child’s mother or father, trying to improve a couple’s connection is imperative.

The Little Things

Sometimes, it is the smaller things in life that mean the most. Rather than make huge, sweeping gestures, maybe your relationship seems disconnected, because the little things have stopped or it is a temporary hurdle you are yet to leap over. Have you guys forgotten date night? Do they no longer listen to you, or, instead, do you no longer listen to them? To improve your relationship, consider the following:

  1. Shake up date night.
  2. Ask: “How was your day?” (Bonus: find better, more engaging, and alternative ways to ask about their day instead).
  3. Laugh more, create inside jokes, and reminisce about the past.
  4. If you fight, do not freak out. Keep your cool and remain level-headed.
  5. Engage with one another more. Exercise, find a joint hobby, etc.
  6. Rekindle your sex life.
  7. Celebrate each other’s successes.
  8. Sometimes this disconnection is fleeting.

The Bigger Things

For some couples, more help is needed. This can seem daunting and off-putting, and many couples will want to bury their head in the sand, so that they do not have to deal with any underlying issues. For the sake of your relationship, though, it is necessary that you do. By delving deeper into your relationship, you may even find that the solutions are simpler than first perceived.

  1. Nurture yourself. Before you can fix your relationship, you need to ensure that you are spending time on yourself and are happy with your own life. Many relationships suffer, because of other aspects of your life; for example, do you enjoy your job, are you physically healthy? You may find that you have not been sleeping properly for a while now and it is affecting your mental and physical health. By buying the best bed for couples, you will find that it could improve your general well-being, which will, in turn, improve other parts of your life.
  2. Stop ignoring your problems. No one wants to waste time and energy mulling over their issues, but by ignoring them, you are only making them worse. Spend time looking at your life as a whole. What are the issues in your relationship? Then, once you have honed in on the issues, find ways to fix them.
  3. Let go of your grudges. If you or your partner have messed up, whether it’s fidelity or financial issues, and you have forgiven them, then you need to do so 100%. There is no room for grudges in a relationship and if you are unable to let go of such resentment, you are wasting each other’s time and living in toxicity. Let go of your grudges, or let go of your partner.
  4. Prioritize your relationship. When you are no longer a teenager and have entered the adulthood of 9-5 jobs and mortgages, finding time (and energy) for your relationship can be tiring and difficult. To keep a relationship afloat, though, you need to put the effort in. You cannot put in minimal or no effect at all, and then expect it to go off without a hitch. Plan a weekend away, go on holiday, or make sure you spend time together each and every evening after work.
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Andi Perullo de Ledesma

I am Andi Perullo de Ledesma, a Chinese Medicine Doctor and Travel Photojournalist in Charlotte, NC. I am also wife to Lucas and mother to Joaquín. Follow us as we explore life and the world one beautiful adventure at a time.

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