Seven Ways To Put Your Personal Stamp On Your Big Day

November 12, 2018

Your wedding is one of the most important, momentous, and romantic days of anyone’s life. It is also a huge logistical undertaking similar in logistical scope to a major military operation. If you want a less stressful time you might be better off attempting to depose a dictator or build a cathedral. Let us not mince words, a wedding in the 21st Century is a costly enterprise. The average cost of a wedding in the US stands at over $30,000. Not to mention all the logistical heartache of organizing all of those complex moving parts. For all of the expense and effort involved in planning a wedding, the last thing anyone wants is a wedding that is bland, generic, and lacking in your own idiosyncratic charm.

Your wedding day is an extremely personal occasion. It is vital that you and your betrothed do not lose touch with that, as you immerse yourself in the minutiae of the experience for your guests and loved ones. In order to make the occasion look, sound and feel like your big day and not just a big day, it is essential that you take steps to imbue the occasion with your own personal style. This will come more naturally for some than others. If you are unsure of what exactly constitutes your own personal style, it can be hard to know where you can inject it into the carefully orchestrated endeavor that is a wedding. You want to make it your own and stand out from the crowd, but you are not quite sure where to start. If you are in the throes of this conundrum, here are some ideas to help you put your own personal stamp on your big day:

Choose a design concept that resonates with you

Your wedding day is a new chapter in your very own story. And just as every writer has their own idiosyncratic style, so too will you choose the way in which your story is told. One of the easiest ways to do this is by coming up with a design concept that unifies all of the various disparate elements of your wedding from the canapes to the seat covers. Keep in mind that there is a difference between a design concept and a theme. A theme pertains to all of the visual elements of the wedding. It may be a color scheme, a recurring visual motif, or a common design element. A concept goes deeper than that. A concept is designed to invoke a very particular feeling.

For example, a seaside themed wedding may be a theme that colors the visual elements of your wedding and will likely have some implications when it comes to the culinary aspects of your big day. However, a concept may be a “Wonderland Wedding”, which may feature not only visual references to Lewis Carroll’s beloved children’s book, but it will endeavor to create a specific atmosphere based on a narrative experience with which we are all familiar. It will aim to create a sense of whimsy, intrigue, wonder, and adventure through a series of carefully made choices from a woodland tea party setting replete with tiny wedding cakes with “Eat Me” labels or little bottles of limoncello with “Drink Me” labels attached to playing card themed table decorations.

Once you have settled upon a design concept rather than a theme that resonates strongly with you, you can really go to down and get creative in coming up with a range of cute and stylish ways in which you can do your concept justice.

Write your own vows

Your wedding vows are a solemn declaration of your love. But the traditional wedding vows with which we are all familiar may not necessarily reflect the specific kind of promise that you want to make to one another. The familiar wedding vows are derived from the Sarum rite of medieval England. Needless to say, times have changed somewhat since then. Our perception of marriage, of love and even of gender are far more fluid nowadays. As such, if you don’t feel as though the traditional wedding vows are right for your relationship, do not be afraid to throw out the rule book and make your own. Not only does this add a distinct personal touch to your wedding, it makes the actual act of marriage itself far more meaningful, resonant, and personal for you. Here are some useful and practical advice on writing your own wedding vows.

While w a’re on the subject of ancient traditions. . .

If there is a tradition that does not sit right with you then get rid of it

The traditional white wedding in an idyllic church is the ultimate relationship goal for many. But if it is not your goal does not feel as though you are beholden to it. Even if you do dream of a white wedding, do not assume that you must adhere to every time honored tradition if you don’t feel as though it resonates with you.

If you have never been a big fan of cake, do not feel that you have to spend a fortune on one. What is the point of spending thousands on something that makes you gag? Especially when there are so many delicious alternatives out there. If you hate the traditional wedding march, you feel free to walk down the aisle to any music you like. Do not worry about the disapproval of your parents, grandparents, or any other staunch traditionalists in your family. They love you and they will be delighted to share in your big day regardless of the minutiae!

Make your aisle tell a story

Some couples choose to make the aisle down which both bride and groom walk a timeline of their relationship. They take their first steps at the date they met, stride down past the first kiss, the proposal date, vacations, the dates in which any children were born or any other significant dates in the relationship. It’s a cute little flourish that helps to tell everyone the story of your love.

Find a photographer who gets you

If you are in the process of planning a wedding, it is more than likely that you have heard the same things from a variety of your married friends and family. That the wedding day itself is a blur, one that it passes by so quickly you will wonder where your day went. And while these assertions certainly have a basis in truth there are steps you can take to prevent your wedding day from passing you by. Besides, your wedding is not just one day. It starts on your big day, but continues for the rest of your life. A huge component of what will help you to keep on living your wedding day over and over again is your choice of photographer. Your photographer is a vital component of your big day, and when choosing one, it is not just important to hire someone with talent and experience, it is also important that they get you!

They will be excited by your design concept and come to the table with their own ideas to make the uniqueness of your occasion shine through in your images. They will have a lot of experiences with weddings similar to yours and know what to capture to tell the story in your photo album. They will also be able to use post-production tweaks to imbue your photos with that little bit of extra magic to help it to match and elevate your memories.

The music

The music in your wedding should be a musical guide to your personality, your love, and your relationship. It should be particularly matched to both of you; a playlist of his and hers anthems. As such, do not worry about packing your wedding disco with floor fillers, just so that your new mother-in-law can strut her stuff to “Dancing Queen”. Let your wedding be a celebration of your love told through music and lyrics. People will flood the dance floor regardless.  

Your wedding dress

The wedding dress is the ultimate symbol of a wedding in the hearts and minds of brides and one of the most vitally important things to get right. It will enable you to feel as beautiful and delighted, as you deserve to feel on your big day. But finding “the one” can be a laborious and costly process. If the right dress does not jump out at you, remember that there are a number of ways in which you can customize your dress and make it your own, especially if you happen to be handy with a needle. You can build your own dress from scratch or simply add a few creative flourishes to make the garment more your own and more flattering to the unique contours of your body. Many brides tailor or embroider their own dresses to add more idiosyncratic touches. Just check out some of these gorgeous gowns created by talented DIY brides. Even something as simple as adding a monogram to your veil can make a big difference.

Planning your wedding can be a stressful enterprise. But it can also be a wonderful and creatively rewarding activity. If you feel as though you have become a back seat passenger in your wedding planning, it is time to put yourself back in the driving seat and make your big day your big day!

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Andi Perullo de Ledesma

I am Andi Perullo de Ledesma, a Chinese Medicine Doctor and Travel Photojournalist in Charlotte, NC. I am also wife to Lucas and mother to Joaquín. Follow us as we explore life and the world one beautiful adventure at a time.

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