When My Hair Started Falling Out: The Truth About Healing After Weight Loss, Illness, Surgery, Perimenopause, And Grief

There is a particular kind of heartbreak that no one prepares you for — the moment you realize your body is trying to tell you something… and you do not yet understand the language.

For me, it started in the shower.

More strands than usual. Then more. Then enough to make me pause.

I had already walked through so much: losing 200 pounds due to a serious illness, undergoing multiple surgeries, navigating deep grief, and stepping into perimenopause. I thought the hardest parts were behind me.

But then my hair began to fall out.

And suddenly, I was confronted with a new question: How much can one body hold before it begins to let go?

A year ago, my hair felt like the one thing my body and I did not have to worry about.
Long. Healthy. Strong.

I had no idea how much was about to change — or how deeply hair loss could affect not just my appearance, but my confidence, identity, and heart.

Looking back at this photo now feels bittersweet. But it also reminds me of something important: my body knew how to grow and heal once before… and I believe it will again.

The Perfect Storm

Hair loss rarely has just one cause and in my case, it felt like the perfect storm.

• Rapid, significant weight loss
• Physical stress from three surgeries
• Emotional trauma and grief
• Hormonal shifts from perimenopause

Each of these alone can trigger hair shedding. Together, they created a cascade my body simply could not ignore.

What I was experiencing is often called telogen effluvium — a temporary condition where stress pushes hair into a resting phase, causing increased shedding weeks or months later.

But knowing the name did not make it easier. Because this was not just hair. It was identity. Femininity. Control.

The Emotional Side No One Talks About

We talk about weight loss transformations. We talk about healing journeys. But we rarely talk about what happens when your reflection no longer matches how hard you have fought to feel whole.

Watching my hair thin felt deeply personal. After everything my body had endured, this felt like one loss too many.

And yet — when I really sat with it — I realized something: My body was not failing me. It was recovering.

Hair loss, in many cases, is not destruction. It is simply a delayed response to survival.

What I Am Doing Right Now

I made a decision early on: if I was going to walk through this, I wanted to do it intentionally and share it honestly.

Here is exactly what I have started:

1. Medical Testing First

Before anything else, I am working with my hematologist to check:

• Iron levels (ferritin is key for hair growth)
• Thyroid function
• Hormones
• B12

Because no product can fix what is happening internally.

In full transparency, the serious illness I alluded to earlier was extreme iron deficiency anemia that was rapidly causing my body to shut down. I almost died and I do not say that lightly.

It was a terrifying wake-up call about what can happen when you spend too long putting yourself at the bottom of your own priority list.

Thankfully, my iron levels are now much improved (though I have to be checked every 3 months). My thyroid is perfect, I am meeting with an HRT specialist in two weeks, and while my B12 is still very low, I have started monthly injections to help rebuild what my body has been missing.

2. Oral Minoxidil

I started my first dose of oral minoxidil from Hers last week.

It is a more aggressive approach, but one that can be incredibly effective for regrowth. After a lot of research and careful consideration, it felt like the right next step for me — and I plan to document the journey honestly over time.

If I am being completely authentic, I am extremely anxious about the initial shedding phase that can happen at first. The idea of losing even more hair feels terrifying right now.

But every person I have spoken to who went through it has told me the same thing: once the shedding stops, it is absolutely worth it.

3. Nutrafol + Stress Support

I also invested in Nutrafol supplements, along with their stress support formula.

One thing I am learning through all of this is that hair growth is not just about nutrients — it is also about calming the internal environment that allows healing and regrowth to happen.

I know some people experience extraordinary results with Nutrafol, while others see little change at all. Right now, I am simply hopeful that my body responds kindly to the support I am trying to give it. Also, I am supplementing with Pique, which I already know helps my health and wellness overall.

4. Scalp Care (The Only Sponsored Item)

The only gifted item in this journey has been the Scalp Massager CM11B — and honestly, I am so grateful. The scalp massager comes from Arboleaf, which is a health and wellness brand known for its range of lifestyle wellness devices.

The Scalp Massager CM11B has quietly become one of my favorite parts of this journey. The 360° massage feels incredibly relaxing and helps release so much tension I do not even realize I am carrying in my scalp and body. I also love that it encourages circulation and deep cleansing, creating a healthier environment for hair growth and overall scalp health. And because it is lightweight and portable, I find myself using it everywhere — while working, relaxing at home, or even traveling. It has turned into such a comforting little ritual for me.

And honestly? My son keeps stealing it because he loves it so much too! In case you are interested as well, use code: Andrea at checkout for 10%-off.

5. Finding A Hair Stylist Who Truly Cares About Your Hair Health

One of the most important parts of my hair journey has been finding a stylist who genuinely prioritizes the health of my hair over everything else — even when it means telling me “no.”

My stylist, Tatiyana, has become such an important part of this process, because she is incredibly protective of my hair. If it were up to me, I would honestly see her every single month. But she refuses to book me before six weeks, since she knows my hair needs time to rest and recover. That level of honesty and care is rare, and it has completely changed the way I approach my hair.

Instead of pushing unnecessary appointments or treatments, she is constantly focused on strengthening my hair, protecting it from further damage, and helping me make long-term decisions that support healthy growth. She is also always recommending products and tools that actually help — not just trendy products that look good online.

Over the past few months, she has introduced me to some incredible hair products that have become staples in my routine. I will link a few of the products she swears by below, because when someone who truly understands hair health recommends something, I listen.

• Vegamore
• Collagan
• Collustrum
• Heat Protectant
• Shampoo
• Conditioner
• Leave-in Styling Treatment
• Dyson Airstrait™ Straightener
• Brush

I think so many of us have been conditioned to believe that more appointments, more treatments, and more heat somehow equal “better” hair. But one of the biggest lessons I am learning is that healthy hair often comes from patience, protection, consistency, and trusting someone who genuinely has your best interests at heart.

If you are struggling with hair loss, breakage, stress shedding, or damage, finding the right stylist can make an enormous emotional difference too. Having someone in your corner who treats your hair with care and compassion during such a vulnerable season means more than I can even explain.

And honestly? Sometimes the best stylist is the one who loves your hair enough to tell you to stay home and let it heal. If you are in Charlotte, NC I cannot highly recommend her enough. She has been in my life since my 20’s! Her website is TanyaTones.com.

What I Am Learning

This journey is teaching me something unexpected: Healing is not linear.

You can lose weight and/or beat an illness and still feel fragile.
You can survive grief and still feel undone.
You can do everything “right” and your body still asks for time.

And maybe that is the lesson. Not to rush the process, but to support it?

What I Hope To Document

Over the coming months, I plan to document this journey honestly — the progress, the setbacks, the shedding, the regrowth, the emotions, and everything in between.

Because when I was searching for stories like mine, what I needed most was not perfection.

I needed hope.

Closing

If you are walking through hair loss right now, I want you to hear this:

You are not broken.
Your body is not betraying you.
It is recalibrating after everything it has carried.

And growth — real growth — often begins in the quietest, most invisible ways.

I am in this with you. And I will share every step as my hair — and my body — find their way back.

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If you are walking through this too, I would truly love to hear from you.

Have you experienced hair loss after illness, stress, surgery, weight loss, or hormonal changes?

What has helped you physically, emotionally, or mentally through the process?

I am still learning, still healing, and still hopeful — and maybe we can help each other feel a little less alone along the way. 🤍